Reasons
why no one is anything
heero's not toast. and the other boys aren't anything, either! =D these were all sent in by you, the fans, so be proud! i do almost no work for this part. YOU DO IT ALL! doesn't it make you feel all warm and fuzzy inside to know that you helped make this site better?!
~Mozzarella Cheese~
by Pym
1. Mozzarella came from Italy. Relena came from Sanc. ‘Nuff said.
2. Mozzarella has an IQ of approximately
0. Relena, on the other hand, has
been officially certified to be
–39.
3. Mozzarella is widely known to
be neuter. Scientists, on the other hand,
are still debating about Relena’s
gender.
4. Mozzarella can be melted in less
than ten minutes. Relena, on the other
hand, must be broiled for at least
two hours before he/she/it can be
consumed. If anyone wants to.
5. Mozzarella may be sticky, but
it can still be washed off. Relena, on the
other hand, can never be gotten
rid of once he/she/it decides to stick to
you. Especially if your name happens
to be Heero Yuy.
6. Mozzarella is enjoyed by millions
worldwide as a pizza topping. Relena,
on the other hand, inspires mostly
loathing, disgust, anti sites, and
mutilations by effigy.
7. Mozzarella may be touched and
consumed without ill effects. Contact with
Relena, on the other hand, may result
in nausea, convulsions and brain
damage.
by Trio Maxwell
-Heero's far too good for Releena
-Heero thinks Releena's nuts and refuses to date her
-If I ever caught Releena dating Heero I would kill Releena and chain Heero
to my wrist forever! (Muahahaha!)
-Releena doesn't date gundam pilots who can't make up their mind as to what
side they are fighting on/for
-Releena and Dorothy are secretly in love with eachother
-The idiot girls never get their men (don't believe me? Watch Escaflowne)
-Releena's whiny friends would get too jealous of Heero and kill him, and
Releena knows it, and doesn't want Heero to die
-Heero threatens to kill her the first time they meet, and she's scared
-Heero will kill her
by Trio Maxwell
-She lusts after Heero when she should be lusting after Duo, cuz he's much
sexier! (Then again, if she did try to go after Duo, I'd kill her myself!)
-she chases after rhinoceroses, expecting them to be a good lay
-she drives a pink car
-she's a pacifict in a war zone
-she's not in the military
-she wears the gayest uniform I have ever seen! (that's why the people in
the army or navy or whatever who used to wear it gave it up!)
-her favourite color is pink
by Wicked Lady
1) You can kill Relena as you can kill toast
2) Heero can beat the hell out of toast and so can he to Relena.
3) You can burn Relena as well as toast.
4) Toast can do just as well running a goverment meeting as Relena can.
5) Toast looks better with marshmallow hair than Relena does...
By Destini
DEATH
Relena can and WILL die!!! Jeez,
you wouldn't believe how many people I know that wanna rip her throat out,
but that's expected, ne?
Bubblegum can't die, because it wasn't alive in the first place. Duh. HOWEVER, a part *was* alive. See, the chewy part of the gum comes from trees, and trees were alive, but then of course people chop them down *sniffle* and use the trees for wood, and gum! And that is your science lesson for today...
ABILITIES
Relena can stalk people (preferably
gun-toting, spandex-wearing, Omae-o-korosu-ing, self-destructing teenage
boys), act like a goody-two shoes (or at least TRY), and scream her bloody
head off when she calls someone's name (I personally think that her "HEEEEEEROOOOOO!!!!"
is the only sound worse than a fork on a chalkboard).
Bubblegum does not do any of the above. It simply stays in nice foil wrapping until you decide to chew it, and then it bends, and twists, and stretches, and you can blow it up into a bubble with your mouth! It would be nice to bend, and twist, and stretch Relena to the point where she breaks and dies, but I'm not even going to consider the blowing-her-up-into-a-bubble-with-your-mouth thing...that's just too gross for words. Plus, bubblegum can be sweet, whereas Relena is not.
FRIENDS
Relena? Having FRIENDS?! What sort
of crack are you SMOKING???!!!!! Ok, so maybe she's got Noin, Dorothy,
and the girls at her school to admire her, but they couldn't possibly be
her *friends*. Nope, no way, never, absolutely not...
Bubblegum has friends. No, I'm serious! I'm bubblegum's friend! And, uh...my friends Draconia and Danriea are bubblegum's friends too! But, we are not, and I repeat, NOT Relena's friends (I hear Danriea just bought a new gun for a *special* occasion).
CLOTHES
Relena has clothes. Yup. She's got
her school uniform (which she looks ugly in), her normal clothes (still
looks ugly in them), and her dress when she was Queen (and even though
she's got a crown, and her hair's done all purty and stuff, she *still*
looks butt-ugly).
Bubblegum has clothing. Not a lot
of clothing, but clothing nonetheless. It has it's foil wrap, and then
t's stuffed into a package with other bubblegum, so the package is another
piece of clothing! And trust me, bubblegum looks better than Relena ANYDAY,
no matter how primped up she gets.
Got a reason why Relena isn't something?
SEND IT IN!
heero and the other gundam wing stuff here aren't MINE, dammit. they're [c] someone else. toast is also not mine. ><. moron.
but the art and the layout ARE mine. all mine. no takee. no takee and all will be toastee.